So, I should be finishing up my paper but...I can't stop crying. I should hold this all in and suck it up.. but I need to get it out. I have been so caught up in being sad, being happy, being every possible emotion and .. ughh, I cannot take it anymore. I do not want to be 1500 miles away from trevor, I do not want to be 3 hours away from my family... I do not want to do it anymore. I want to be at home. I am half tempted to call him and talk to him, but he went to sleep and it's not like it would do anything or he could say anything.. maybe having a video chat wasn't the best idea.. now I am all upset. UGH, why why why does everything FINALLY feel like it's going great, and then it all gets pulled out from underneath me.. I am sooo frustrated, I think my body temperature is raised like no other..
I know no one said it was going to be easy, but i don't quite get it.. and right now i am not looking for some bs reason.. b/c it doesnt change anything. I guess I will be done ranting, throwing a fit..complaining, doing what i do best. finishing this stupid paper and going to bed, or maybe showering and going to bed if there is any time left.. so over this.. over it over it over it!!
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